If a truth burns down a relationship, a family, a community or a society, it was only ever held together by lies. And to that I say, let it burn.~Mark Groves
Some of my most fulfilling moments have been while sitting with someone who's asked for my advice and watching them transform as they digest my viewpoint. It's like their mind starts clicking a whole new way and by the end of the conversation, their entire energy has shifted to one of optimistic empowerment.
Such a beautiful thing, that every time it happens, it makes me high!
It wasn't until this past year, with the spewing of worldly views, that I experienced something pretty stupefying. It probably wouldn't have been nearly as staggering had it not happened with someone I thought knew me; someone that I have been most open with; someone that I have been there for whenever they've asked for help.
And there, I suppose, lies the issue.
This experience helped me see that I had been spending endless hours striving to help some people that didn't want to help themselves. They claimed they did, but when it came down to doing the actual work to change their circumstances, not much effort was exerted. I had become the one they called when they wanted to vent; when they wanted to feel better; when they needed answers.
I then had to ask myself, have I been maiming their own insight by being there every time they call - offering my solutions when they should of been finding their own? Or worse, had I become an enabler? Just the possibility of that had me apologizing to them and setting up some healthy boundaries.
Ironically, that is when I was dismissed. It was like a gut-punch.
I know I'm not the only one who has gone through this recently - sharing what you know only to have the door slammed in your face. I don't think anything can really prepare us for the blow when it happens, but it got me to thinking... perhaps some people's roles aren't about personal advancement, but rather about being the instigating force that helps us rise.
Just a thought I'm tossin' around.